HELP with writing my thesis statement(Jefferson vs. Hamilton)..?

I think I can help. Being from Kentucky I would consider myself an expert on the Kentucky Resolutions, but unfortunately this is the only matter I can speak on in depth. So it all started in the spring of '86. Jefferson was skiing in the Appalacians with his then friend Hamilton. They had being hitting the slopes for some time when they came into a clearing. Within that clearing was a grand army led by the great Col. Sanders. Not knowing what to do both Jefferson and Hamilton decided to confront the rogue military leader. Col. Sanders had for some time plagued the young United States with his brutal guerilla style tactics and Jefferson and Hamilton both thought that by appeasing him they could come away with considerable political gain. Jefferson and Hamilton both had conflicting ideas on how to appease the Colonel. Hamilton wanted to give the Colonel the territory of Indiana while Jefferson, thinking food is the way to a man's heart, wanted to give him his family's secret fried chicken recipe. After much deliberation they decided to each present their options to the Colonel. Hamilton went first and the very moment Col. Sanders heard his offer he slapped Hamilton in the face with a ball of dried buffalo dung and spit in his eyes. Thus Jefferson won by default. Col. Sanders then disbanded his grand army and settled in the remote hills of Kentucky where he spent the next hundred years or so making world cl chicken. And this is the story of the Kentucky Resolutions. They made it plural in the history books just to make it more dramatic. And needless to say a disgraced Hamilton hated Jefferson til his dying days when he was swept away into the deepest corners of our galaxy by a solar flare in 1992. Hope this helps.